"I had a student from Jamaica tell me that marathoners are from Africa because they have lots of land for running and sprinters are from Jamaica because they have only a little land for running." – gamesapp
I need to know this kid's thoughts on why bicycle races happen in Europe.
"I was talking to my cousin about snakes and explained that some snakes were bigger than him. He didn't believe me so I showed him a picture and he looked at me like I was a moron and said, 'That snake isn't bigger than me, it just has more long.'" – TheKate_est
This kid is gonna grow up to be that guy who overcompensates for not feeling big enough, isn't he?
"I was donating some of my niece's clothes that she had outgrown and she told me not to. I asked her why not, and she said because when the clothes got small enough she would put them on her dolls.... No concept of her growing, she thought the clothes were shrinking." – peaches9057
"I'm a girl, and my best friend when I was little was a boy. We were on the bus on a field trip and both fell asleep. When we got to wherever the field trip was, he freaked out, thinking that LITERALLY sleeping together would make me pregnant." – PixelizedPaperPlane
Of course he freaked out. That means he'd have to get a job, and no kid wants to wear a suit every day.
"When we were kids my little sister and I were watching my dad clean out the fish tank. As he refilled it with water she suddenly panicked and shouted, 'WHOA DAD, NOT TOO MUCH, THEY'LL DROWN!' Still bring it up 20 years later." – down_vote_magnet
Don't worry, kiddo. Those little guys can hold their breath even longer than Michael Phelps.
"We moved to France from Texas when I was 6 and my little brother was 3. The first day that we played outside with the French kids, my brother came running inside to my mother hysterical, bawling his head off! The reason, he said, was, 'Their mouths are broken!'" - ToJudy