"Which president wears the largest hat?"

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Answer: The one with the biggest head.

"How many sides has a circle?"

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Answer: Two. Inside and outside.

"What is always on its way here but never arrives?"

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Answer: Tomorrow

"What is it that no man wants, but no man wants to lose?"

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Answer: A lawsuit

"I have billions of eyes, yet I live in darkness; I have millions of ears, yet only four lobes; I have no muscle, yet I rule two hemispheres. What am I?"

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Answer: A human brain (it contains billions of optic and auditory nerves, four lobes and two hemispheres)

"A king of England in whose reign the Bible was translated and a capital city of the US."

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Answer: James Madison

"Shades shifting as I leave the Earth and sky, my place is not on land; it’s not up high. No one else dreads his exile with such fears, but I would make the world be lush with tears."

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Answer: A cloud

"There are two doors. One leads to the castle; the other, to certain death. You may ask one question, to one guard, to help you decide which door is the correct one. One guard always lies, and one always tells the truth. How do you choose?"

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Answer: Ask either guard which door the other guard would say leads out. Then walk through the opposite door you’ve been told.

"A hunter leaves his cabin one morning. He walks 5 miles south, then 5 miles west. He shoots a bear. He then walks 5 miles north and ends up back at his cabin. What color was the bear?"

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Answer: White (he's at the North Pole)

"I have two coins totaling 15 cents. One of them is not a nickel. What are they?"

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Answer: a nickel and a dime (one isn't a nickel)

"A man is found hanging dead from the ceiling of a room. The ceiling in the room is 15 feet high. The man is only 6 feet tall and the rope was only 4 feet long. There are no windows and only one door into the room. The door is bolted shut from the inside and there is a puddle of water under the man. How did he kill himself?"

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Answer: He hanged himself from a block of ice and the ice melted.

"Thirty white horses on a red hill. First they champ, then they stamp, then they stand still."

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Answer: Teeth

"As I was going to St. Ives, I met a man with seven wives. Every wife had seven sacks. Every sack had seven cats. Every cat has seven kittens. Kittens, cats, sacks, and wives; how many were going to St. Ives?"

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Answer: One - the narrator

"What weighs more: all the trains that pass through Grand Central Station in a day, or all the trees cut down in a year to print US currency?"

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Answer: They weigh the same: nothing. U.S. currency isn't printed on paper from trees and trains go through Grand Central Terminal, "Station."

"There are 12 men on an island. Eleven weigh exactly the same amount, but one is slightly lighter or heavier. You must figure out which. The island has no scales, but there is a seesaw. You can use it only three times."

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Answer: Use the seesaw to weigh men #1-4 compared to #5-8. There are three possible results:

#1-4 are the same weight as #5-8.

#1-4 are heavier than #5-8.

#1-4 are lighter that #5-8.

If #1-4 are heavier, then you know one of the islanders in #1-4 is heavier, or that one of the islanders in #5-8 is lighter. Also, you would know islanders #9-12 are the standard weight, neither heavier nor lighter.

Now weigh 1, 2 and 5 compared to 3, 6 and 9. If the scale tips in the same direction as before, you know either 1 or 2 is heavier or 6 is lighter. Now weigh 1 against 2. Whichever side goes down is heavier. If neither goes down, 6 is the lighter.

If on the second weighing, the seesaw tips in the other direction, then either 3 is heavier or 5 is lighter. Weigh 5 against 12. If it goes up, 5 is lighter. If not, then 3 is heavier. If the balance of the second weighing is even, you know from the first weighing that either 4 was heavier or 7 or 8 was lighter. Now weigh 7 against 8. If one side goes up, that is the heavier one; if they are even, 4 is the heavier one.

...got it? Good!

"What's weightless, can be seen by the naked eye, and when put in a barrel makes it lighter?"

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Answer: A hole

"What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?"

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Answer: African or European?